Yup, she’s up and going.  She is not perfect nor is she great but she is going.  I will be posting as well as working on design issues but she is still readable!  YAY!  I welcome all input, creative or otherwise.

This is my official last post on this blog and I am quite happy and feeling good about it.  Please!  Tell me what your thoughts are!

Jen

SO, I realize I am down to blogging once a month and that’s because I REALLY want to get my other website up and going before I really dig in.  And with that being said, here’s what’s been going on since I last posted!

It was with mixed feelings that I left Ohio about 35 days ago.  I had fun spending time with family and Doug and have to admit, I secretly am in love with the rolling green hills of the Amish Ohio country side, but The Universe has pointed out on more than one occasion that now is not my time to be there.

I moved back to Colorado as of April 2nd and couldn’t be happier with any decision (except that whole India thing).  With the help of a good friend, I have started my own business assisting seniors and challenged people and it’s been going well thus far!  I have been accepted to Naropa University in Boulder for the Master of Divinity program starting this fall.  I have been running into old friends and have been busy as a bee getting caught up and telling my story.  For some reason, people would rather hear me tell the story than read the blog even though there are pictures on the blog.  I have been finding myself running into complete strangers that want to hear my story and I end up making MORE friends.  I have been having a particularly fun time hunting down people and passing out the presents that I got them.  My family at Sopris has been welcoming yet understanding that I have no desire to ever return to A)the computer world and B) work for a large corporation.  They have all begged me to come back but understand that it just won’t happen.  I guess I underestimate people?  I have lunch, hang out and chit chat with more Sopris people than I can imagine some days.

I have also been running into people that can probably help me with bringing Rinzin over for school, how cool is that?  OH!  I almost forgot, I am moving to a sustainable farm in Boulder on June 1st where I am going to be learning strawbale building and different uses for adobe.  They also have some alternative energy projects going on that they need help with so I’m getting practice for my future!  In the mean time, I am staying with the gracious and wonderful Steve and doing house sitting gigs for people.  I am tentatively scheduled to go north to get the kitties on May 28th and I CAN”T WAIT!  I miss my cats so bad.  Patrick sends me pictures and it actually makes me sad when I see them.

I’ve also had some more people contact me about their own trips to India.  Some need reassurance that they won’t end up dead while some just need a little direction and a pep talk, either of which I am happy to provide.  I am also hot on scheduling my next trip back to India next summer.   It’ll only get to be a month long but I’m soooooper excited about it because I have people that want to come with me!  How cool!

I have been making an effort to get out more so I took Tracy Kileen to Denver’s First Friday art walk this past Friday night.  Not only did she and I have a blast, she bought me an ADORABLE hand beaded bracelet and I took her to Mercury Cafe for dinner and she fell in love with the place just as I did a couple years ago.  While on the art walk, we ran into my good friend and former walking partner, Bobby To, and we caught up a bit.  He is joining me for my birthday dinner tonight so we can catch up appropriately.  Bobby is a PV Research Science Engineer at NREL and he and I always have a lot to talk about.  Yesterday I took Steve’s 9 year-old son to a Rockies game and I got hella sunburnt but we had a good time eating everything in sight and watching the Rockies pound the Dodgers!  So I guess I’ll spend the rest of the summer remembering sunblock.  GUH.

Well, I’ve got work to do so I’m going to have to cut this post short.  Being my own boss means I can get things done at strange hours and sometimes that means taking advantage of those strange hours just to get things done, ya know?  And my commute is killer!  No getting dressed if I don’t want to.

SO I’m off to pick up a birthday breakfast treat for myself; wheat-free, gluten free coffee cake at Logan’s coffee shop.  I am thinking about taking cupcakes to a client’s house today, one for each of us.  He’s a lot of fun and totally gets that just because I chose to work on my birthday doesn’t mean I’m not going to have some fun!

I have pics to post but they will have to wait.  And for all of you faithful readers, I promise to try to keep up better with the blogging now that I’m atleast settled in one state.  I’m going in so many directions that sometimes I forget.

Happy Birthday to MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I totally forgot to explain the Donation Button to the right>>>>  As long as this website exists and I am alive, I am still raising money for the nuns and this website is now officially one of the fund raising tools for Jamyang Choling!  YAY!  SO if anyone would like to donate money to Jamyang Choling, feel free to do so through that button.  I’ll make sure the girls get it because I was best buddies with the nunnery accountant!  HA!

Lots going on here in Ohio since my last post….what seems like a year ago. My new website is still sitting in a corner staring at me, I applied to Naropa for the Master of Divinity program and am waiting to hear from them, Doug has been in and out of the hospital with a life-threatening staph infection and cellulitis (VERY SCARY), The Brahma Kumaris came from New York to turn my world upside down, make me long for India, reminding me to meditate and left like a cloud in the breeze, Stephanie has two new fillies in Longmont (can’t wait to go pet them!), went to Everett and picked up my car from the wonderful Kristen, had a GREAT meeting with Shoshanna in Denver, attended my first drumming circle in Montrose, Ohio (holy crap cool), got CPR/ADF and first aid certified, have started to read The Bible, my money has officially run out AND I can’t wait to get back to Colorado in the next 7 days.

Over to the right you will see that I finally posted my reading list from India. It’s a doooooozie.

Okay, I know some of you are probably wondering what the heck is going on with me…..I started meditating again. I know, I know, I never should have STOPPED but I DID and I paid for it. Dearly. SO I started meditating again a couple weeks ago and that is my big lesson on why it’s good to make the effort to be present. When you’re not present in your everyday life, you flounder and do dumb things. I have also been making a concerted effort at changing some of my behavioral patterns and auto-responses so that’s been quite a roller coaster as well. Doing self work is rewarding yet, exhausting and Doug said he has watched the process and it’s definitely a self-induced place of crazy that only I can get myself out of.

I haven’t found a place to do the photo exhibits here in Ohio and I’m guessing that’s because I wasn’t going to stay here long! You just never know! I surely would have known had I been meditating and staying present (as I stick my tongue out at myself and use my snottie voice) I also had this crazy urge to clean all of my junk out of my parents basement 2 days ago. I threw away a LOT of junk and it was cathartic. I had a great time reminiscing while going through boxes of stuff from when I was married some 6 years ago. 6 years ago? Wow.

My mom and dad’s puppy, Zoe, is almost 6 months old and weighs 17 lbs! She’s a solid black mini-schnauzer and she’s ADORABLE and is surely daddy’s girl. She gets spayed next week (poor thing). She’s gonna be HUGE when she’s full grown. More of a standard than a mini if you ask me. I tried my hand at working on computers again and HATED it more than anything I’ve ever done in my life. I passed the task onto my parent’s neighbor-kid Brian as he’s a little computer wiz in his second year at Akron University and even writes his own computer newspaper column in the Medina Gazette. Thank GOD he’s around to take over working with dad’s computer, I was so done with that. I would rather empty bedpans at a hospital than fix computers of a living ever again.

SOOOOO, that leaves my exit from the state. My tax return check should be here any day now and that will allow me to get BACK IN THE CAR (WONDERFUL as it is) and drive BACK to Colorado. I LOVE Colorado. My buddy Steve has graciously offered up his spare bedroom, in his HUGE Longmont house, while I get myself set up. All I have to do is get a job and a place to live and get to Everett to get the kitties all in anticipation of school starting this fall! YAY! Orientation is the second week of August or there abouts so I just need to find something that I can do full time for summer and back it down to like 75% time and switch to evenings when school starts. I am more than willing to get extra student loans to cover my butt the first semester to have some cushion as far as figuring out job and money. It’ll be tough but it’ll be worth it. I just know I’m going to get in to Naropa so I might as well embrace the poverty! I just want my kitties back!

Seeing the kitties for a few days in Everett was wonderful. Witnessing how all of the animals interact in the house was fun to watch as well. Keiko held a bit of a grudge initially but when she saw Sam getting all kinds of attention she realized that pride wasn’t worth not getting love from her mommy. I told them I’d be back to get them before August so I gotta get my act together!

The big project that I have staring at me is getting to Dove Creek and picking up my stuff from my cousins’ farm. I am trying to figure out how to get out there and stay a bit. AND have a job AND find a place AND get the kitties AND get my life together. I’m sure it’ll all work out but one thing I was counting on SO much to be able to do is to go to Dove Creek and BE for a while. I miss Linda and David like no other and I really want them back in my life full time but it’s hard to do with life and all of it’s unexpected twists and turns. I officially have nobody in my life full time.

I’m also looking forward to being in the Boulder area so I can get some help bringing Rinzin over to go to college. BAH! I need some more things on my plate, doncha think? Good lord.

So that’s it for now. Everything and Nothingness. The ‘Everything’ is all of the drama and whatnot the material world drops in our lap. The ‘Nothingness’ is my reminder to meditate and keep opening that still space in myself so that being present is a possibility.

I’m back.

I woke up this morning compelled to write what could be my last official post on this blog!  WOW! Came out of nowhere really but I know it’s the right thing to do.  This chapter is closing and I’m working on my new blog/website as we speak to get my new chapter up and going.  Life is good, people!  Things have been wonderful here at Chez Doug and I wouldn’t have asked for it to be any different.  I’ve learned tons of lessons since I’ve returned and am working very hard on keeping with me the person I found in myself while I was in the land of “Do I really need to wash my hands?  Do I really want to chance electrocution today?”
I love and miss my girls.  We email.  Especially Rinzin and I.  Just the thought of someone in America trying to find her money for American college makes her too excited to do home work some days.  She sent me a poem on Valentines  Day, telling me how much she misses me and loves me.  She’s probably the closest thing to a daughter I’m going to have in this life and I’d like her here with me.  I’m working on finding venues for the photo exhibit, as the CD arrived about 2 weeks ago and I can’t wait to get something up and going but haven’t gotten out to Seattle to pick up the car so hmph.  We shall see.

I’ve been having a blast rediscovering NE Ohio.  I haven’t spent much time in this area since 1995 so getting out and making friends has been fun.  And no, things haven’t really changed all that much except for a couple store fronts in Highland Square.  Highland square is of course my ‘hood of choice.  It reminds me of where I lived in downtown Denver but not quite as volatile.  I am seeking a job in that area as well as housing.  I was sad to see Two Amigos closed.  After talking to someone that owns a business one block from it’s former venue, I learned that neighborhood drama is still neighborhood drama.  Shit happens and stuff.

I’d like to write more but I want to save it for the new website.  This blog isn’t about Highland Square so let’s leave it at that, shall we?  I have to get moving because I’m going to drop off flyers in the area today for a group I’m doing volunteer work for.  www.bkwsu.com  Yes, yes……I still volunteer……even in Ohio where Volunteering is almost a dirty word.  I put up a craigslist ad the other day for a musician to volunteer 2 hours at a conference.  Within 5 minutes some not so nice person emailed me and asked me exactly how many hours I had ever volunteered to get my career off the ground.  WELL……After trying to do the math and it equaling somewhere over 5 continuous months, I felt it best not to respond to his email.  He doesn’t know who I am and I’m not going to start a pissing contest with a stranger over something that just doesn’t matter in the big picture.  If he wants to be not nice, he can do it else where.  I deleted his email.

And speaking of VOLUNTEERING…..I found a great website….www.idealist.org.  All the volunteering you can shake a stick at and NONE of it here in NE Ohio.  Go figure.

And with that, I believe I am almost DONE HERE.  The new website will have a link to this one and I DO have some little loose ends to tie up and some stuff to write but it ain’t comin right now, people, so it’s just not time?

Rinzin just emailed me, I gotta go!  I hope everyone is well.

Okay, so I’m starting to get some emails (read flak)  inquiring about my lack of blog posts since I’ve been back.  The plain and simple truth of the matter is that I’m not ready.  What I need to say is whirling around in my head but hasn’t settled yet.  I’m even having trouble emailing people and getting complete sentences out correctly.  This is the end of my beginning and I want to get it right.

I’ve also had the distinct displeasure of being sick.  AGAIN.  7 days ago my ear infection returned with unfettered zest and I had a sinus infection that made me snore like a freight train.  I’m betting dollars to donuts I never actually threw the ear infection while in India, but that’s merely a hunch.  I’m currently staying at Saint Doug’s house, in Cuyohoga Falls, to try to prevent getting my parents sick.  He has forwarded an invitation that I remain here after I am well and I am taking him up on his offer.  Doug has often referred to the snoring as ‘cute’ so I know I’m not over-staying my welcome and he seems not to mind the sofa as he has relinquished his bedroom and private bath to me.

Needless to say, my mind is in knots at this point.  I sincerely apologize for my lack of blog posting and my lovely cousin Linda gently suggested I post an “I’m not ready to post” blog post out of consideration for my readers so that’s what this post is.  It’s the “I’m not quite ready to post” post.  I am sorry I have been remiss in communicating to everyone properly the level of physical and somewhat mental illness I am suffering.

The end of my trip has been a trip in itself!

Please be patient.

Genla